Is it ever the right time to lie even if it is to help someone or just a little, white lie?
No. The Eight Commandment states, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor” (Ex 20:16 & Dt 5:20). St. Paul says, “Stop lying to one another, since you have taken off the old self with its practices” (Col 3:9). Jesus says, “Let your ‘Yes’ mean ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No’ mean ‘No.’ Anything more is from the evil one” (Mt 5:37). St. Augustine defined a lie as “speaking a falsehood with the intention of deceiving.”
Most of us realize that lying is wrong, but it becomes less clear in our own consciences when we feel that lying would “help” someone or spare hurting someone’s feelings—what we often call a “little, white lie”. However, do white lies hurt someone? If the person to whom we told a white lie found out the truth, would they be hurt? What about the person who tells the lie? I would guess that the more a person compromises the truth on little issues, the more likely they are to do it for a bigger issue. In addition, it is a moral principle that we can never do evil to achieve good.
However, simply because we are obliged always to tell the truth, doesn’t mean we always have to tell everything. The Catechism says, “No one is bound to reveal the truth to someone who does not have the right to know it” (CCC 2489). In this case we can be silent on the issue or tell part of the truth but leave out what the person has no right to know. This is different than lying since there is no falsehood, and the intention is not to deceive, but to protect someone’s privacy or to protect the good and safety of others. To give an example: Suppose someone gives you as a Christmas present a Missouri Tigers t-shirt and asks you if you like it. To say, “Yes, I love it,” would be a lie. Instead, you could simply say, “thank you,” or “what a lovely gift…” leaving out the part that it would be a lovely gift for someone else, not you! In this case, you are protecting the fragile ego of the giver while still respecting the truth.
-Fr. Greg
